6 Ways Satan Sneaks into Your Marriage
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By Vivian Bricker, Crosswalk.com
We often hear many people say, “The devil made me do it.” While this is a common saying, it is not biblical. Without the devil in the equation, we would still be capable of terrible things. Since we are fallen sinners (Romans 3:23), we need to be aware that many problems in our life are not by the devil’s hand.
The devil can cause many problems for us; however, we don’t need to believe we are excused from every sin. Our shortcomings often cause many problems in our marriage. The devil tries to creep into our marriage, often using things that we are already struggling with to accomplish his task.
The more we prepare ourselves and put on the full armor of God, the more we will be able to take our stand against the devil’s attacks (Ephesians 6:10-18). By putting on the armor of God each day, we will be able to protect ourselves against his lies, falsehoods, and temptations.
1. Placing Temptation in Your Life
One of the most common ways Satan sneaks into your marriage is by placing temptation into your life. When God created marriage, it was intended to be between one man and one woman (Genesis 2:24). These two individuals are expected to be devoted and faithful to each other. Sadly, infidelity is one of the leading causes of divorce. Even though married couples can work through infidelity, the road is not always easy, and it often ends in divorce.
Satan may try to tempt you into committing adultery. Even if you think you are walking firmly, be aware. If you are tempted by someone at work, a friend, or even a social media influencer, it is time to end the relationship with this person. Although you may say nothing has physically happened yet, you also need to consider your thoughts (Matthew 5:28). Just thinking about the act could lead you to committing the sin.
Never allow sexual temptation to destroy your marriage. You already have your spouse. This is the person you chose and the person you love. Is the love of your life worth sacrificing for one night of infidelity? No, your spouse is not worth losing. Return to your spouse and love them as the Lord commands. Ask the Lord to help you overcome this temptation, and He will strengthen you (1 Corinthians 10:13).
2. Useless Arguments
Another way Satan tries to sneak into your marriage is by useless arguments. These arguments can be caused by financial issues, family issues, or something else within your marriage. Do not allow these arguments to destroy your marriage and cause you to be at odds with your spouse. If you are prone to initiating arguments, choose to take a breather and ask yourself, “Why am I always trying to start a fight with my spouse?”
Whenever something happens that bothers you, talk things out with your spouse. Let them know how you are feeling, but avoid arguments. Arguments do nothing but tear your spouse down.
Satan wants you and your spouse to be at odds with each other, and this is often done through arguments. Choose to be mature and merciful as you mention troublesome words, actions, or behaviors. As soon as you start yelling and fighting, there will be discord. Allow God to work in the situation and choose to listen to Him instead of the impulses of the flesh.
3. Distance Apart
“You shall not commit adultery.” (Exodus 20:14)
Many husbands and wives have jobs that require them to be away for extended periods, often due to conferences or job training. In either case, these situations can cause spouses to become disconnected from each other.
While there is nothing wrong with being away from your spouse on a work trip, it is wrong if you are using this as an opportunity to indulge in sin. Sadly, many husbands and wives now have “work wives” and “work husbands” that they are sexually attracted to.
Husbands and wives, ensure you don’t have anyone like this in your life. This trend is not biblical, and it certainly does not bring glory to God. You have one spouse, and this is the person you married.
Whether you are at home with them or five-hundred thousand miles away, you are still called to be loyal and faithful to them. Satan will try to use this distance to pull you away from each other, but you can fight back against him.
This can be accomplished by praying to God for strength and asking for His help in overcoming any temptations that come your way. It can also be done by consistently connecting with your spouse each day while you are away. Give your spouse a call or do a video call with them each night after work.
This can keep you accountable and away from temptation. It will also help your spouse feel loved and valued, since you are taking the time to spend with them even while you are away.
Related Article: 6 Things Every Christian Needs to Know about Adultery
4. Comparison
“Why aren’t you like other husbands? Why aren’t you as successful as other men? Why can’t you take care of the house like other wives?” All these comparisons are ways that Satan will try to sneak into your marriage. The moment you start comparing your spouse to other people’s spouses is the moment your marriage is going to begin suffering.
Comparing your spouse to someone else’s spouse will make them feel awful about themselves. They will think they are not good enough and will slowly distance themselves from you. It can really hurt someone’s feelings when you tell them they are not as good, successful, or beautiful as someone else’s spouse.
Avoid making comments or asking questions such as these insulting remarks. Choose to live a life free of comparison and love your spouse for who they are.
Love them for who they are and allow them to be their own person. Start noticing all the little things they do and how they go out of their way to make you smile. By doing this, it will help your spouse feel loved and valued. Satan will continue to try to make you feel tempted to compare your spouse to others, but choose to turn away from these types of thoughts and words.
5. Pornography
Pornography is rarely spoken of in the church. The church should help those struggling with watching pornography as well as their families. By addressing the problem, counseling the individual, and praying for them, the church could drastically help an individual turn away from sin.
Sadly, pornography is one of the most common ways Satan sneaks into marriages. Pornography gives people a false view of intimacy, bodies, and love. Within pornography, there is no real love. It is only rooted in lust and the exploitation of men and women.
Pornography has the capacity to ruin your marriage. Many marriages have ended over pornography. Don’t pick up this habit, and if you already have, repent and turn away from it.
God will forgive you and purify you from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9). Ask the Lord to free you from this prison and to give you a proper view of intimacy, bodies, and love. Due to pornography distorting these things for you, it probably has already shown up in your marriage.
Turn to the Lord and away from pornography. As soon as you do this, you will notice a positive improvement in your marriage. If you have been watching pornography for a while, it can be more difficult because it can quickly evolve into an addiction. If it has become an addiction, you need to seek out help from a therapist.
If your spouse doesn’t know, be honest with them and tell them you want to change, but you need help. Your spouse loves you and they will be able to help you work through this struggle.
6. Secrets and Lies
Whenever secrets and lies come into a marriage, we know that Satan has raised his ugly head. After all, he is the father of lies (John 8:44). While the devil cannot make us do anything, he can tempt us.
Stand strong in the Lord by avoiding keeping secrets from your spouse and not telling lies. Build your marriage upon the truth. If lies come into your marriage, it will be hard for your spouse to ever believe you again.
As one can imagine, secrets and lies will soon ensure your marriage will fall. And this is precisely what Satan wants. The devil doesn’t want to see God’s children being happy and in love. Instead, he wants to destroy, distort, and pervert every good thing.
You can stand against the devil by avoiding lies and secrets. Be honest with your spouse about every situation and never keep secrets from them. Trust God with your marriage and resist the devil (James 4:7).
